Random Funniest Jokes With Long Set Ups That Are Totally Worth the Wait (19 items)

• (#13) It could've been worse.

  James is walking on a downtown street one day, and he happens to see his old high school friend, Harry, a little ways up ahead. "Harry, Harry, how are you?" he greets his old buddy after getting his attention.

  "Not so good," says Harry.

  "Why, what happened?" James queries.

  "Well," Harry says, "I just went bankrupt and I've still got to feed my family. I don't know what I'm going to do."

  "Could have been worse," James replies calmly. "Could have been worse."
   

  A month or so later, James again encounters Harry, in a restaurant. "And how are things now?" he asks.

  "Terrible!" says Harry. "Our house burned down last night."

  "Could have been worse," says James, again with total aplomb, and goes about his business.

  
  A month later, James runs into Harry a third time. "Well, how goes it?" he inquires.

  "Oh!" says Harry. "Things just get worse and worse. It's one tragedy after another! Now my wife has left me!"

  Harry nods his head and gives his usual optimistic-seeming little smile, accompanied by his usual words: "Could've been worse."
   

  This time, Harry grabs James by the shoulders. "Wait a minute!" he says. "I'm not gonna let you off so easy this time. Three times in the past few months we've run into one another, and every time I've told you the latest disaster in my life. Every time you say the same thing: 'Could have been worse.' This time, for God's sake, Harry, I want you to tell me: how in Heaven's name could it have been any worse?"
   

  James looks at Harry with the same little wisp of a smile. "Could have been worse," he says. "Could have happened to me."
• (#10) The Germans and Americans were reaching a stalemate in WWI.

  In World War I there was trench warfare, and neither the Americans nor the Germans could get the upper hand. They were reaching a stalemate. One day, an American came up with a plan that would win them the war. This private explained his plan to his trench mates, and they figured, "Why not? It's not like we have any better ideas." The next day, an American soldier called out, "Hans!?" A German popped up and shouted back, "Ja?!" Boom, the German was shot dead. The next day the Americans shouted again, "Hans?!" "Ja?!" Shot dead. This process continued over the next couple of days. The Germans were losing large numbers, and were now finally catching on.

  The Germans had an emergency meeting. They thought they could come back from the heavy losses using the same tactics as the Americans. Thus, a German asked, "What is a popular American name?" "John!" replied another. The next day, the Germans decided to execute their plan. A German shouted, "John!?" An American called back, "Is that you Hans?!" "Ja!" And that is how the Americans won WWI.
• (#19) An Native American chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant.

  The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated that he built her a teepee made of deer hide.

  A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide.

  The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. The chief then challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred.

  Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys.

  "Correct," said the chief. "How did you figure it out?"

  The warrior answered, "It's elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides."
  
• (#8) NASA was preparing for the Apollo project.

  When NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, some of the training of the astronauts took place on a Navajo reservation.

  One day, a Navajo elder and his son were herding sheep and came across the space crew. The old man, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question that his son translated. "What are these guys in the big suits doing?"

  A member of the crew said they were practicing for their trip to the moon. The old man got all excited and asked if he could send a message to the moon with the astronauts. Recognizing a promotional opportunity, the NASA folks found a tape recorder.

  After the old man recorded his message, they asked his son to translate it. He refused. The NASA PR people brought the tape to the reservation, where the rest of the tribe listened and laughed, but refused to translate the elder's message.

  Finally, the NASA crew called in an official government translator. His translation of the old man's message was: "Watch out for these guys; they have come to steal your land."
  
• (#16) A physicist, an engineer, and a mathematician are all locked in separate burning buildings.

  The physicist runs to a chalkboard, calculates exactly how much water he will need to put out the fire, runs and finds that amount, puts out the fire, and survives. The engineer pulls out a calculator, calculates exactly how much water he will need to put out the fire, runs and finds 10 times that amount, puts out the fire, and survives.

  The mathematician runs to a chalkboard, calculates exactly how much water he will need to put out the fire, declares, "There IS a solution!", and then burns to death.
• (#11) A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption.

  One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Amal. The other goes to a family in Spain. They name him Juan. 

  Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Amal.

  He responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
  

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