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  • (#7) Fake Four Eyes

    From Chuuucky24:  

    "When I was like... 10 or 11, a lot of my classmates got glasses. I thought they were pretty cool, so I faked having myopia in order to get glasses as well. I wasn't too dumb [though], I pretended that I could see better with lenses that had a small diopter so they didn't actually damage my eyesight.

    The downside was that my parents thought using the computer had something to do with it, so they didn't allow me to use it anymore." 

  • (#1) There's Having An Embarrassing Dad, And Then There's Having A Nazi Dad

    From Kevinera:  

    "My dad's a National Socialist and he regularly goes to meetings, I was raised on Germanic folklore and the idea that I'm superior to others because I'm of German decent. I have plenty of Jewish and Slavish friends and I just tell them my dad died when I was younger […] my dad's a Nazi" 

  • (#19) Tuna's In Cat Heaven One Way Or Another

    From misssnizzle:

    "We had an old cat growing up named Tuna. He was 16 or 17 and had a long and happy life but was really deteriorating. My mom did not want him put down as it was her cat and she seemed to be in denial about how decrepit and near death this cat was. One day she comes home from the store and my dad calmy tells her that he found Tuna dead under a tree in the sun. She was happy he died peacefully and on his own terms. What she doesn't know is that she actually ran him over as she was leaving for the store. She obviously didn't feel him under the tire but my mom killed her cat and we all lied about him dying in his sleep."

  • (#13) What Would You Do For A Beatles Record?

    From what-size

    "One time I sucked a dude's d*ck for Beatles originals on vinyl. 

    Still don't regret it every time I listen to Rubber Soul or Help!, yet I get the faint taste of nut in my mouth." 

  • (#4) Lying About Losing Your Virginity

    From Rebel4thecolorbrown:  

    "Probably the fact that I lost my virginity at 24 and not 18. At that point I knew it wasn't going to be magical […] but I had this thought that I needed to get this done. I met a girl online and she took a liking to me. She hung out at my place for the second date and of course things happened. I did it in a very pragmatic and clinical way. My mind went 'Lick here, stick this here.' 

    She did mention how bad I was but I played it off as me being rusty." 

  • (#18) Passing Off An Imitation As A Real Gift

    From cobhc83:

    "My father bought me a beautiful Fender Stratocaster for my 15th Birthday. It was unique, and gorgeous. I sold it to a guitar shop when I was 20 because I needed the cash. I never had the heart to tell him. I even found one exactly like it almost 10 years later, after I had become financially stable. I bought it in an instant. He still thinks I have the guitar he got me for my birthday. I still don't have the heart to tell him."

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