Random Impractical Footwear Sported By Superheroes (15 items)

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  (#1) Dick Grayson

  • Young Justice, The Batman, Batman & Robin, Batman, DC Universe

  The costume Bruce Wayne provides for his young ward, Dick Grayson, in 1940’s Detective Comics #38 has a lot of immediate issues with it - and the footwear is definitely one of them, though perhaps not as obvious a problem as the lack of pants. The Batman sends Robin on nighttime missions against the worst Gotham City has to offer in nothing more than pixie booties - which fit loose and don't appear to offer any protection or support.

  The Boy Wonder has to fight villains in slippers for the next few hundred issues and several decades - well into his time with the Teen Titans. Robin wears the spritely footwear until he gives up the gig to become Nightwing - and then Jason Todd steps into his booties. It isn't until the emergence of the third Robin, Tim Drake, that the Dark Knight's sidekick starts wearing more reasonable footwear.
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  (#2) Tyroc’s White Workout Booties 

  Tyroc’s footwear is probably the least bizarre aspect of his overall costume - and that's saying a lot, because Tyroc's loose-fitting, oddly pointed workout booties are incredibly bizarre. Making his debut in 1976's Superboy #216, Tyroc is a problematic character from the start - and the discomfort-inducing design is par for the course when it comes to Troy Stewart of Marzal Island.

  Tyroc's booties don't look like they'd be good for any physical activity outside of deep squats, but neither does any part of his outfit. He’s dressed more for an '80s workout video than for saving the world with the Legion of Super-Heroes. In later appearances, Tyroc is mercifully granted a less revealing costume - but he's still been mostly relegated to the dustbin of poorly thought-out comic book creations.
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  (#3) Silk Spectre II

  • Watchmen, Watchmen

  Watchmen is a timeless comic, and as such, the costumes of its heroes don’t always correspond with the era in which the story takes place. That’s especially true for Silk Spectre II, who fights alongside Doctor Manhattan and Nite Owl in a pair of stylish - but not supportive - stilettos.

  Stilettos have long been a trademark of the femme fatale, but they’re really not conducive to running, leaping, or performing spin-kicks - all of which are regular requirements of a non-powered crimefighter. At one point, Laurie Jupiter bolts into a burning building while wearing the kind of footwear that would get her booted off any job site - much to the chagrin of fire marshals everywhere.
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  (#4) Black Canary

  • Justice League, Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths, DC Universe

  Black Canary’s iconic high-heeled leather boots have been a part of her attire since her debut in 1969’s Justice League of America #74 - as have the equally iconic fishnets that complement them so perfectly. Dinah Lance's overall aesthetic is an undeniable accomplishment when it comes to fashion, but it's a questionable choice for actually performing the duties of a Justice League member - especially one who relies so heavily on martial arts. One would think 6-inch heels might prove a challenge when performing roundhouse kicks.

  Over the years, Black Canary has experimented with more practical garb, and each and every time she’s returned to the thigh-high look before too long. At this point, it’s just an accepted fact that she can punt villains in the face in high heels as well as anyone else can in reasonable footwear - and if that fails, she's always got her sonic scream to back her up.
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  (#5) Iron Man

  • Iron Man: Armored Adventures, The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, The Super Hero Squad Show, The Incredible Hulk, Ultimate Avengers, Next Avengers: Heroes of Tomorrow, Iron Man 3, Iron Man, The Avengers: Age of Ultron, The Avengers, Iron Man 2, Planet Hulk, The Invincible Iron Man, Ultimate Avengers 2, Marvel Universe

  Tony Stark has contributed plenty of world-changing inventions to the Marvel Universe, but his rocket-powered roller skates are definitely not among them. The skates first show up way back in 1963's Tales of Suspense #40 - in which Stark develops them for a presumably confused military - but he soon finds an excuse to incorporate them into his Iron Man armor.

  Stark can be seen rocketing around on his skates well into the '70s and '80s in various Avengers comics - well past the date at which such accessories would be socially acceptable. That's to say nothing of the fact that a man who regularly flies around via rocket power has absolutely no need to then apply that technology to roller skates. Then again, inexplicability has never stopped Tony Stark before.
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  (#6) Batgirl

  • Batman, The Batman, Fight Batman Fight!, Batman & Robin, DC Universe

  The fact that Barbara Gordon wears overly exaggerated heels in her Detective Comics #359 debut is no surprise. After all, DC Comics wanted to emphasize the femininity that set their new Batgirl apart from the already established Batman and Robin. That she keeps those same bright yellow boots well into the modern era of the new millennium, however, is reason for more than a few raised eyebrows.

  Whereas Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, and the rest of the Bat-Family do battle with the ne'er-do-wells of Gotham City in custom-made combat boots, Gordon apparently insists on adding a few inches of heel to the equation. While this might seem like an issue for one who spends so much time leaping from building to building, it hasn't tripped her up yet. Barbara has to wait until she moves to Burnside in 2013 to swap out her original kicks for a more contemporary set of steel-toes.
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  (#7) Emma Frost

  • Wolverine and the X-Men, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, X-Men: First Class, Generation X, Marvel Universe

  Emma Frost has the unique ability to take the skimpy, male-gaze-intended garb of the stereotypical superheroine and absolutely own it. As one of mutant-kind's resident psychic powerhouses, Frost can get away with her underwear- and corset-heavy wardrobe - and that goes double for her love of thigh-high boots.

  However, in Grant Morrison’s New X-Men - right around the time that Emma switches to a more daring platform heel - it's revealed that Frost has a secondary mutation that can turn her skin to diamond at will. This leads to her actually engaging in the martial side of superheroics a lot more than she did in the past. But she still hasn't made the switch to a more comfortable choice of footwear.
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  (#8) Thor

  • Thor: The Dark World, The Incredible Hulk Returns, Thor, Hulk Vs, Thor: Tales of Asgard, Ultimate Avengers 2, The Avengers, Next Avengers: Heroes of Tomorrow, Marvel Universe

  Walt Simonson’s epic run on The Mighty Thor - lasting from 1983-1987 - is rightfully recognized as a formative period for the God of Thunder. Thankfully, not all of the fashion cues laid down by Simonson have stuck around. Under his pen, Thor started sporting a set of armored leggings that were wrapped up in an excessive amount of golden bandaging - and that culminated in the sort of kneepads that could only result in chafing and obstruction.

  Thor's kneecap protectors are so large that he almost has to be portrayed in a powerful stance with his legs spread apart; if he were to be shown in motion, they'd be clanging against one another. It's not a terribly practical piece of equipment, even for an Asgardian - nor is it something a real Viking would ever even consider.
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  (#9) Dazzler

  • Marvel Universe

  As a disco-themed superhero, Alison Blaire gets away with the kind of fashion choices that would be considered faux pas for any other comic book character - but sometimes even Dazzler can take things too far. That's definitely true when it comes to fighting villains in her roller skates.

  Dazzler's wheeled wonders show up pretty soon after her debut in 1980's X-Men #130, and it isn't long before she's riding into battle against bad guys propelled by her sonic abilities. These days, Blaire typically reserves her roller skates for her onstage routine, preferring to fight for the X-Men and A-Force in more practical footwear.
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  (#10) Wonder Woman

  • Justice League Unlimited, Wonder Woman, Batman vs. Superman, Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths, Justice League: Doom, Wonder Woman, Secret Origin: The Story of DC Comics, Movie 43, Wonder Woman, Justice League: New Frontier, DC Universe

  Wonder Woman has gone through her fair share of costumes over the years, but the presence of boots has been relatively consistent - except for a brief period in the Silver Age when she switches to a pair of strappy sandals that appear to offer absolutely no ankle support. Traditionally, that's important to have when engaging in mortal combat.

  Despite the obvious flaw in their design - and the fact that they often appear more as flats than sandals - Diana of Themyscira wears the needlessly complicated shoes from 1949 until the mid-'60s, when she finally returns to boots that are far more suitable for butt-kicking.
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  (#11) Flash

  • DC Universe

  As a hero from the Golden Age of DC Comics, Jay Garrick - the original Flash - can be forgiven if his fashion sense doesn't translate to the modern era. The winged colander he wears on his head may have worked in the mid-20th century, but the soft boots he's usually sporting have always been highly impractical - especially for a superhero who’s always on the run.

  High-performance runners wear all manner of high-tech footwear to lend them support, grip, and protection when pounding the pavement, but Garrick is out there flying around at superhuman speeds in what looks like a pair of Uggs. The tiny wings attached to the ankles are meant to evoke a feeling of speed, but they’re actually rather anti-aerodynamic, and they stick out like sore thumbs in the modern era of comic books.
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  (#12) Supergirl

  • Supergirl, Movie 43, DC Universe

  DC Comics' New 52 reboot in 2011 brought about new status quos - and new costumes - for all of the heroes and villains in its catalogue. While most of these changes were well-received, others were not - and Kara Zor-El takes a notable loss in the fashion department.

  In an effort to get away from her traditional skirted look, the New 52 Supergirl combines a bikini bottom with thigh-high boots that inexplicably fail to cover her knees. Though mobility is the presumptive reason for the cutout section, that doesn’t seem like it should be an issue for someone who spends much of her time flying through the air - nor does it seem like it should necessitate leaving her knees completely exposed. These days, the boots have been quietly retired to the back of Kara's closet.
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  (#13) Zatanna

  • DC Universe

  Much attention is paid to Zatanna’s trademark fishnets and her even-more-trademark absence of pants, but the black pumps have also been a part of her aesthetic since she made her DC Comics debut in Hawkman #4. Other than a few experiments with more modest get-ups, Zatanna's costume has remained largely consistent throughout her years as a crimefighting magician - and she's proven more than capable of spitting spells in a pair of short heels.

  The shoes Zatanna sports on a regular basis don't look like they'd be comfortable for running, kicking, or jumping - though, admittedly, she only employs these skills in emergency situations. Most of the time, Zatanna is repelling evil while standing perfectly still - preferring to use her words to her fists - so she can get away with wearing whatever she wants on her feet.
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  (#14) Hawkeye

  • The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, Thor, The Avengers

  With a heavy purple theme, vague allusions to Robin Hood, and an occasional skirt, Hawkeye’s costume has always been full of question marks - and that includes what he chooses to wear on his feet. Clint Barton’s boots have always been a little floppy in nature, but they really reach their peak in Mark Gruenwald's mid-'80s Hawkeye solo comic, in which the Arching Avenger sports some boots he looks to have borrowed from an exotic dancer.

  Hawkeye’s boots fold over themselves to such a degree that he’d almost certainly be tripping over them in any action-packed situation - and Barton has a habit of finding himself in the middle of action-packed situations. As one of the few non-powered Avengers, Hawkeye needs every advantage he can muster - and he definitely doesn't need the disadvantage of impractical footwear.
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  (#15) Wolverine

  • X-Men: First Class, Superhero Movie, Hulk Vs, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, X-Men: Days of Future Past, The Wolverine, X-Men, X-Men: The Last Stand, X2, Marvel Universe

  Ever since Wolverine's Marvel Comics debut, his costume has been needlessly pointy - most prominently in the case of his mask, which inexplicably exaggerates his already preposterous hairstyle. For an equally inane reason, Logan's boots often feature a motif similar to his iconic 'do - and some artists choose to take this extraneous fabric to the extreme.

  Following 1993's "Fatal Attractions" crossover - in which Magneto rips the adamantium right from Wolverine's bones - the character spends a portion of time as a feral mutant. During this period, Logan swaps out his mask for a bandana and starts to speak in grunts and growls - and, rather illogically, his knee extensions also grow to ridiculous proportions. It’s hard to imagine Feral Wolverine not constantly tripping over himself.

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